I swear this just happened.

I just walked to work, as usual. I went into the fruit shop along the way (as I often do) and bought myself a bunch of bananas. I came out and crossed over the road. Looking up I saw an old Maori guy crossing the road from the side I'd been on to the side I'd just arrived on. However this guy was casually walking, even though there was a huge farking garbage truck about to hit him...

It JUST missed him and he was obviously totally obvilious, or didn't care that he'd nearly been flattened. I was trying not to stand there going "Holy Fuck Holy Fuck" but I wasn't really doing a few good job. I had just seen a man nearly squashed to bits. Anyway, he starts walking towards me and I can't help but have a big grin on my face. Oh yea I also had my music on full blast. Anyway, this guy stops me. I thought he was about to give me a lecture on not laughing at people, even if they nearly got squished. But no, he wants directions to some street I've never heard of. I reply that I'm sorry, I don't know where that street is. As he was asking me this, he was putting a fairly large bunch of notes into his wallet.

Him: "You're A Kiwi?"
Me: "No mate, Aussie!"
Him: "No Shit! Where abouts? I've just arrived here from Sydney"
Me: "Really! Nice! I'm from Tasmania!"
Him: "Wow Really! My first wife is from Tasmania, Burnie in fact"
Me: "That's cool, that's where my Mother grew up, it's a nice place"
Him: "What's your name mate?"
Me: "Tim"
Him: "Pleased to Meet you Tim, I'm George Martin. I'm back home after 10 years. I just won the Lotto in Australia, $680,000. Thought I'd come home again for a visit"
Me: "Wow, good on you!"
(bit of handshaking)
Him: "Yea! Really pleased to meet you Tim, give me a Hongi" (Rub noses thing)
Me: "Errrrrr..."

But too late, the nose rubbing occured. By now I'm pretty much freaking out. I mean, he was really nice and friendly, but this was just a little too werid for me.

Him: "Hey, have you got change for a $50"
Me: "Sorry, I don't. I just spent my last $2 in the banana shop"

This was true, I don't have any cash on me at all. I don't carry cash these days though, only my plastic cards.

Him: "What about your eftpos cards"

Now I lied. I wasn't about to tell him how much money I had in my bank accounts.

Me: "Sorry, I don't really have any money in these accounts either..."

Suddeny he gets all put out looking, like I've really pissed him off.

Him: "Well Tim, I was just going to share some of my good fortune"

Then he storms off real quick, all friendliness gone.

That's all. This just happened, 15 minutes ago about 5 minutes away from work. I have no idea what to make of it. George Martin? Rather ODD name don't you think? He had all that money, why did he want to know if I had change? Was he really going to share his money with me? Did I just miss out on lots of money? Who knows? Who cares! But it certainly was pretty farking werid. I have to stop being so friendly to strangers...

-- Tim